Wow. You know those thrillers where you're at the edge of your seat the whole time because the actors, director and writers hit it out of the park? Yeah, those movies are phenomenal and some should be arriving at our theatre soon.
Until then, we have Whiteout. Yes, I know this is the dead season of film where the "contractually obligated" dreck goes to die, but please! This film is borderline offensive with its dullness.
The plot is based on a dull graphic novel no one read because the story wait for it sucked.
It's of little surprise that the film adaptation is worse.
The plot centres on Kate Beckinsale as Carrie Stetko investigating Antarctica's first murder.
Alarm bells go off immediately when she is first introduced. She utters not a word but walks down a hall and into a room. She then hangs a badge on the wall and begins undressing then has a steamy shower.
That's some creative character building. Oh, but it gets better since it's her last day on the job. Very clever.
Yet more "crap writing" alarm bells go off when there are flashbacks every 10 minutes - of footage you just saw. Not kidding.
She even has repeat flashbacks just in case you missed something, which you won't because every clue is highlighted, and your hand is held to the very end when you really don't care that in a whiteout, you can't tell anyone apart and really, if there was any justice, they would have all died 20 minutes into the film.
